Categories: Movie and Series Reviews, 2.5/5

Midsommar (2019) 2.5/5

Categories 2.5/5, Drama, Horror, Movie and Series Reviews, Mystery, Thriller

There are elements of greatness to Midsommar that are undeniable but I treat each review with how I valued the movie and not necessarily the merits I can objectively see. The production is incredible and the design is used in interesting ways that emphasis all of the effort that was put into pulling it all together. However, and I know I am regretfully kicking at someone a lot of people loved and I wanted to love, I just didn’t think Midsommar was a great movie and I found it often to be superficial.

I normally connect to the oddities that come out of A24 a bit more, but I just couldn’t do that here. The characters all ended up feeling apart from the scenarios they were in, and not in an artistic way but in a nonsensical way that felt like the script was in the room with us most scenes. The situations were all just too much fantasy and the characters universally reacted with words and emotions that did not make sense unless we accept that they have to make sense for the goals of the story.

I have no doubt that the director, Ari Aster, is extremely talented. I still need to watch his other work, Hereditary has especially been on my list for some time. I am hoping to see an equal amount of strength in the story as I found in the atmosphere here. For someone like me, who often feels most at home with movies that take place in a single place, I felt my patience was going to be rewarded with Midsommar rather than wanting the time back that I spent.

I am glad people enjoy the movie more than me. I feel like they should. There is a treatment to grief that I feel it is good to consider. Ultimately it feels like a modern take on the slasher movies of old, with very patient shots and the destination taking priority.

True Detective: Season 4 (2024) 2.5/5

Categories 2.5/5, Crime, Drama, Horror, Movie and Series Reviews, Mystery, Thriller

Season 4 of True Detective benefits a lot from its cast, with everyone involved turning in great performances. Kali Reis and Jodie Fosters, the leads this go around, give nuance to their characters that make them compelling to watch. Reis has to play it a bit more straight while Foster gets to come across more as an antihero, and it is legitimately fun to watch. Reis does get an interesting romantic relationship though that flips what we are used to seeing and that was exciting.

Not all of the supporting cast can say they get as much to do. Christopher Eccleston is a presence that is around until he suddenly isn’t, and Fiona Shaw is mysterious and underdeveloped for the role that she plays. Again though, nobody does poorly with what they get.

The first episode sets high expectations and is truly unsettling. Unfortunately it did not pay off, and the final episodes explanation just made me wonder if these were really True Detectives if so much went unnoticed. What is worse is the use of horror-like elements sometimes come across cheap. An orange can be a powerful way to connect ideas together and imply something going on with a persons mind, but what are we to think of random spirits behind our characters that they never see? There is no story there, unless the implication is that the audience is hallucinating or going through something spiritual.

Benefiting the show is its cold atmosphere, set in the remote town of Ennis, Alaska. The sets are great and become a bit of characters themselves. Visually, the show should be commended. It really sells this cold setting and the cast leans into it.

Jodie Foster’s character asks people around her to ask the right questions, but you aren’t rewarded for doing that here as the audience. Why was there a need for secrecy in these two peoples relationship? There wasn’t. Why did that guy sit up in his bed and say what he said? Spooky vibes. And on and on. The show wants to be really smart, but it does not stand up to even the most basic questions.

By the end of it all, I felt a bit cheated. It never reaches Lost levels of not paying off, but it doesn’t slouch either and its final explanation and whimsical sendoff did not feel good. This is a story that promises a lot and delivers very little. If you can survive on vibes alone though, they are there and they are good. I’m not really mad, just feeling a bit let down. For a show that started so strong, and felt like it had something to say, it could have gone with a much stronger writer to make it all feel connected. I may never know who wrote, or had the time to write, “we are all dead,” but I certainly died a bit from the lack of cohesion.

Silent Night (2021) 2.5/5

Categories 2.5/5, Comedy, Movie and Series Reviews, Thriller

Silent Night is a dark holiday drama that throws comedy, apocalyptic tones, and moral themes into a blender. The idea of the movie is interesting, and the cast is here for it, but the inconsistencies in how it is all dealt out—like how some characters get so little development—are what hold the movie back from being any sort of Christmas contender.

Some more commitment to being darkly humored, or to the melodrama it wants to be, would go a long way toward fully appreciating this English countryside slow-caper. The cast is not slouching, as I genuinely wanted to see more from some, but they never quite go far enough.

On the note of dialogue, abundance of expletives do little to fill the rooms here and it doesn’t really convey what I think was intended — a world that is ending, with societal shackles dropped. Especially when the movie flip-flops between the humor of maintaining a clean household and being nonchalant because, well, end of the world.

The staging, the aforementioned English countryside, holds a lot of opportunity but is little more than a place where the movie happens to occur. Silent Night never feels like it takes full advantage of what it has. The initial reveals of the where, who, and what are legitimately interest! This makes it all the more unfortunate that, in the end, the movie feels wasteful. So much promise meets an unfortunate ending that, in the final act, feels forced and sadly unsurprising.

 

Red One (2024) 2.5/5

Categories 2.5/5, Action, Comedy, Movie and Series Reviews

Shining brightest when leaning into unique ideas on mythology, Red One also does little with what it makes. That being said, Kristofer Hivju’s portrayal of Krampus is kind of awesome beyond the rest of the film. Unfortunately, Christmas magic seems to be missing from Red One. Visual effects, while serviceable, drain a lot of the movies energy with their overly abundant presence. You can feel the green screen imposing upon cheer, lurking. Like the sweet-sapping presentation of a “where it all began” sign, hanging off of a CGI creation of Santa’s original workshop.

Dwayne Johnson is Dwayne Johnson and Chris Evans is Chris Evans with a little bit of Ryan Reynolds in spirit. Both of the leads are likable, but they do not leave such a mark as to feel attached to the movie in any irreproachable union. Watching Evans get rag-doll thrown around in action sequences feels awkward at times, lacking any special powers, and left me wondering if the film forgot he is not playing Captain America.

The movie is not a pure misfire like the poster would leave you to expect and I would never say it is a lump of coal, but it could be a padding gift at the bottom of a stocking. The originality is mishandled, but somehow the film still sneaks in as average. I credit Krampus and his large hands. If you are into action flicks and mindless holiday viewings, then maybe consider Red One. Just be prepared, because the movie runs about half an hour longer than it deserves.

Alien 3 (1992) 2.5/5

Categories 2.5/5, Action, Movie and Series Reviews, Sci-Fi

It feels as though the movie thinks it is returning to the darker themes of Alien, opposed to Aliens, but I think it comes across more as a washy action flick and does not really evoke the heights of either of its predecessors.

I love Fincher’s movies, but I think fans giving him a pass like he did not have a part in this is a bit too easy. I think a lot of minds came together and made a meh movie, and an especially bad one in the context of what came before.

People get fixated on the opening story decision, but I think it is dismissive to think that is the only problem here.

That all being said, there is some good. Some new characters are interesting and there are a couple of iconic shots in the flick. Sets are attractive and on occasion distinct.

It never reaches any height though, and that just feels bad.

Fallen (1998) 2.5/5

Categories 2.5/5, Action, Crime, Drama, Fantasy, Movie and Series Reviews, Mystery, Thriller

Carried largely by an idea and a stellar cast, Fallen is unable to bear the weight of talent. People like to do hypotheticals about movies that could use a remake, and this is a high candidate in my opinion.

Despite its failings, its uniqueness make it still an enjoyable watch and I am a sucker for its vibes. If only it were a little tighter in its writing, rethought its camera tricks, and came across just a bit smarter.

Alien: Covenant (2017) 2.5/5

Categories 2.5/5, Horror, Movie and Series Reviews, Sci-Fi, Thriller

The ending, begging you to be surprised but just sucking all of the excitement out of the action packed air because you know what is coming, takes the movie down a lot. The start of the film was great, promising something that blended Prometheus and its philosophical side with a bit more horror. However, it all derails.

Additionally, you never get the sense of fear from daring stunts or horrifying sights that you would expect, like you got from the original Alien. You are seeing awful things and witnessing daring stunts, but the characters aren’t responding as if that is what is going on.

I’m really bothered by Covenant in a similar way to Prometheus, it is so damn uneven in its executions. What ultimately hurts the movie most though is the former, you cannot build suspense for so long on something that is so obvious.

I will say that the aesthetic of the franchise feels more realized here than in Prometheus. Plus, just like in Prometheus, there are a couple of scenes that are cool on their own.

Event Horizon (1997) 2.5/5

Categories 2.5/5, Horror, Movie and Series Reviews, Sci-Fi, Thriller

I have a soft spot for Event Horizon. Cosmic horror is just rare and kind of fun. I’ve seen the movie quite a few times, but when I watch it I know I am eating garbage. Acting, direction, script, everything is all uneven. Still, the many pieces that take inspiration from other sources have something to them.

Lets stop remaking good movies, lets remake Event Horizon.